Relationship Counselor: Counselor Brenda LPA LMHC LCDC
Read her relationship blog at Getting Back To A Love Affair With Yourself.

A period of mild weather occurring in late autumn.

A pleasant, tranquil, or flourishing period occurring near the end of something

Most of us think of Indian Summers as being associated with weather such as in the first definition. I would like to focus today however on the second meaning of Indian Summer listed above.

It is easy to miss a period of tranquility if we refuse to get still. A pleasant fall breeze or chirping of birds on a clear day might be lost on us if we have not acquired the ability to get "still" with ourselves. We have all heard the old saying "Don't forget to stop and smell the roses" Well what does that mean anyway? And what if you are allergic to roses? How can we get back to a place where we flourish and are at peace when we find ourselves in the midst of a storm tossed life.

For a long time I confused flourishing with money and material goods. I thought that the more money I made and the more I was able to acquire the more I was "flourishing" so to speak. Who knew the whole time I was really drowning and didn't even realize it. I found it impossible to be tranquil or peaceful and forget being pleasant....Instead I felt out of control, hopeless and depressed although I was living the American Dream.

Days, Weeks, Months and Years would pass without me taking time to get "still" with myself for I knew if and when I did finally get still, I might not like what I found. As long as I stayed busy I didn't have to deal with anything or anyone, especially myself. An illusion is great as long as the illusionist has control over his/her illusion. When control is lost however so is the illusion. This can be true regardless of what your illusion is today. If it is not based in reality then the consequences can be very damaging when they come crashing down not unlike a house built without a foundation.

Perhaps your illusion is with regards to your marriage or relationship or maybe like me it has to deal with your financial situation. One of the first steps back to reality and true peace and tranquility is in being honest with yourself about your current situation and the mistakes you have made. We have ALL made mistakes so instead of spending all your energy beating yourself up for that affair which you thought was an "illusion of love" or berating yourself for that bankruptcy you are now enduring because of your illusion of "wealth" STOP: BREATHE: and remember that often our greatest ministry comes out of our biggest mistakes and pain.

You can begin your Indian Summer right here, right now! All you have to do is

• Get Still -really still and listen to what the voice inside of you tells you.
• Be at Peace -learn to be tranquil if only for a minute each day. Make a commitment to yourself for x amount of time, you will be "at peace" and see how that feels.
• Decide to Flourish -where you are at this moment in your life is unique and won't come again. Really make the decision to live in your full potential.

For more help and guidance along your journey, please click here to call me.
Counselor Brenda LPA LMHC LCDC